Here We Go Again!

We had an interesting day today. I'll start with the good news: Addison passed her BPP meaning she did her breathing, movement and had adequate fluid. I got my weekly tests back regarding the mild pre-eclampsia and my levels have actually improved. I am no closer to pre-eclampsia, yay. The not so great news is that in the past 2 weeks Addison has not grown much at all. She is in the 15th percentile (50 being average in case you are not familiar). When babies are in the 10th percentile they deliver you. As you can see we are very close. They only do measurements every 2 weeks and the head doctor does not think I will be pregnant long enough to measure in 2 weeks.

He actually consulted with his team of doctors and the NICU neonatologists (same ones who treated the boys) today and they are going to continue to take things a day at a time. Her lack of growth indicates that my placenta is not nourishing her properly. The dopplers also kind of leveled off also which I can't thoroughly explain but they would like there to be more of a variable from what I understand. He thinks I will deliver within days maybe a week but again, no one really knows. I am a bit discouraged that I made it these two weeks and she hasn't shown growth but I know that it gave her lungs more time to mature and I am sure it had other positive affects otherwise they wouldn't want me to see how many additional days I can stay pregnant.

I am pretty drained from the wait today. It was about 3 hours after they told me that I may be delivering that they actually decided that today was not the day. Thankfully, my friend Stacey visited today and we passed the time together talking. Poor Stacey got here when they were taking me down for my ultrasound and I convinced her to come and keep me company. I assured her that the tests were boring and uneventful. Boy, was I wrong today. So we are left to trust in God for the answers. I don't mean to sound like that is a last resort. It is truly what we do every day whether we realize it or not. He is the one with the answers and the one who supplies our strength when we feel completely drained, which is where Jared and I are at. He promises in Isaiah to "renew our strength" and one thing I know beyond a shadow of a doubt is that he keeps his promises.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers. The boys are starting to ask Jared not to leave them in the morning and anytime he is getting ready to leave even when he is taking them with him Alex is saying "Don't leave me". Eli has been telling us he is sad at random times throughout the day and when he visits. Last night when he was leaving the hospital I was standing at the nurses station and waving goodbye to them and he yelled back to me "I miss you so much". Ugh, it broke my heart and left me teary-eyed in front of the nurses. Little booger, any other time I couldn't have paid him to say that! :) Like I said we all need our strength renewed and we cling to God's promise.