I have put it off for about a day and a half now but I know I have a lot of people praying for me and my family so here is the latest. I came in yesterday morning for a scheduled ultrasound and they discovered that I am having issues with blood flow to Addison. I am showing an absence of diastolic flow. It is at zero and if it were to go negative that would be dangerous to her and they would deliver. They are keeping me here until delivery and as before it could be tomorrow it could be weeks from now. I also am showing higher levels of protein which is indicative of pre-eclampsia but I just got those results and have not spoken with the doctor about that yet. To be honest there are even further complications that we found out at 20 weeks that I haven't even discussed recently because of all these other problems at hand. I have SUA meaning that my umbilical cord is absent an artery. All of these issues have landed me here being monitored very thoroughly. It is not easy but at this point I believe it is what is best. One might think that all of these results are completely overwhelming, however Jared and I try not to get bogged down in the details. I truly trust a God who is in control of the outcome and I KNOW he doesn't want me to get caught up in all of that. He keeps telling me to trust Him and to hope in Him.
On a more positive note. My labs are good and so is my blood pressure. I am feeling good and am not showing any of the more serious sides of the pre-e. I would still love to hit at least 30 weeks which would be 3 weeks from Sunday. Jared told me I should stick to my original goal and I love that he even suggested it because it does encourage me. I don't know. I am not clear on what God is asking of me in that department but I do know that I need to take a day at a time and today Addison is growing inside of me and she stayed put 4 weeks longer than they originally thought she would.
Another amazing thing is that she had lung function yesterday at 26 weeks 2 days. The U/S tech was really surprised and at the u/s I had today they said they don't usually even look for that until over 30 weeks. Since yesterday I was also able to recieve both rounds of the steroid that will further help her development. There are definitely positives mixed in with all of the junk. I still cling to the fact that God already knows what is going to happen and He has always known. That is such a comfort to me. I pray that I can keep in this mindset because let's face it Satan is good at changing my focus. I go from having days of complete rest in God to a moment of doubt that can feel disabling.
Thank you so much to everyone who is helping my family out. It is humbling and overwhelming. Thanks for all of the support and prayers. If you are trying to reach me by e-mail I cannot access my hotmail account from here but I can access my google account which is email@example.com and I would LOVE to hear from you. I have adorable new picture of our Addie girl but I cannot access my flickr account here either so the latest ultrasound pics will have to wait. There is a part of me who can't wait to see her in person however I would rather wait patiently for several more weeks :)